Last night was our 8th year wedding anniversary, and I must say it was not a good day but it ended well.
To be honest I thought we would stay home with the kids, eat supper, put them to bed and maybe just watch a movie together or something like that. Bryan-without me knowing-had planned to have a babysitter come and us go eat and to a movie-so sweet. Well the babysitter called and said she couldn't and would do it on New Year's but she got stuck in Fort Worth with a friend at a doctor's appointment. No big deal but he wanted to go out so I got a sitter, I made supper for the kids and we went to a movie. Well while I was getting dressed Bryan was outside
messing around outside with the new dog- a full blooded Schnauzer. She was 3 years old and had been abused so Bryan bought her and brought her home. He named her Lady. He was in love with this thing. Well the dog saw one of my cats and ran after it and ran into the street and it got hit by a car. Needless to say-Bryan was immeditely heartbroke. Bryan is very sensitive when it comes to things like that. So he really didn't feel like going out but I finally conveinced him and we went to the movies.
We were going to see Marley and Me and a friend of mine says "dont take him to see that-his dog just died." I asked why does that matter? She told me that Marley was a dog and it was about the dog. So instead we saw Bedtime Stories. It was a good movie. Bryan laughed some but not much. He just felt awful.
But I did get to do some of my own reflecting about the day and the years that we have past. Sometimes people get married and think "oh it's going to be lovely and 24-hours of bliss." Or at least that is what I thought.
But what I have learned is there is nothing harder than a marriage. It's something that only the two of you will fight for to save. It is the one person you can litterally get so angry with that your eyes burn but love at the same time. Marriage is based on full communication, full understanding, total patience, and empathy. Sympathy helps but mostly empathy. Bryan and I have survived some tough times but I can assure you what we have fought through has only prepared us for bigger battles up ahead.
We are at a place right now where we aren't in that lovey stage, yes we still hold hands and kiss goodnight-always-but we're okay if we don't want to be with each other. We can still have fun with friends and be away from one another and not be miserable. It's more like a best friend stage.
So here is to another year together-another year to grow, to get mad and get over it, to surprise one another, and most important to laugh. As long as you can still laugh at one another and with each other-your okay.
When you get mad don't push them away, pull them in closer-because no one else is going to want to hold you two together. Hold on til the storm calms.
Hollar later Amber
